Well, I was going to do some yapping about how cultural progressions have altered our religious views and convictions, but I think I'll save that for a day when I have more emotional energy. Today, I feel like I need to share what's in my heart, not what's vibrating around in my head...hopefully those thoughts only gain "umpf" with an extra day or two of brain activity.
I have been struggling with something that is rarely talked about. Women don't really comment on it, or seem to put any thought into it. But, somewhere, deep inside the intuition cubicle of my brain, I have a feeling that I may not be alone in this. Which is really sad, because if most women are silently carrying the same burden, wouldn't it be super if we'd just open up, share our thoughts and work together to fix the problem? Well, I think that would be a swell idea, so I'll go first...."Hi, I'm Heather, and I'm a kindred spirit-oholic." "Hi Heather"......
Seriously, I long for the kinds of friendships I had in high school...not that I want to be friends with high school students. I just miss and crave the closeness of those friendships. The absence of judgement, fear of not being approved of, and of not being thought of as worth spending the only 25 minutes of social outing time we get once a week with.
I don't know about you, but I feel so drained when come home from an outing and all there was going on was a bunch of gossiping, and superficial yacking, leaving about 0.01% of the chatter about things that we all wanted to talk about...our REAL LIFE struggles, victories and dreams. I have a few friends that start on that treck with me, but something always seems to get in the way...
I'm not harping on you guys, I love you all. Just wondering if I'm alone in this boat, and everyone else hopes I sink this one, or if there of some of you that want to jump in with me.
So, to quote the annoying insurance sales man's reocurring line in Groundhog Day, "Am I right, or am I right? RIGHT RIGHT!!!
1 comment:
I was at the Ladies' Nite Out on Friday and came home to confess that I felt like an outsider - among all the ladies that came with friends, after a girls' night out supper, there is a comfort level between them that I don't have with any friends around here. I think for me it's a matter of time - I make time for the friends I can have that intimacy with, but even that time comes after my family. I don't want to be gone even one night a week doing "girls' night" - putting my need for that intimacy ahead of my family. And too, it is easier to have intimacy with a girlfriend than a husband sometimes - the whole gender thing means we sometimes speak different languages. I don't want girl-friendships to take the importance off pursuing a deep level friendship with my husband.
It's a tough issue - might be that those friendships are meant to be few because we appreciate them more then!
I do appreciate being able to talk to you - I always feel like our visits are on that deeper level and a friendship that builds each other up honors God.
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